Self Reflection – And Other Keys To Creating A Life You Love

Is it possible to have a life you love? You have probably heard that you should live your life to the fullest. It’s a wonderful idea but who has the time to live their dream life, we are all just so busy. Or worse yet we can’t even imagine what our dream life would look like.

How do we begin to identify our dream life with bills to pay, kids to raise, a job to go to. I believe we all want to be happy and would love to be living a life we feel excited about. Too many people feel like they are living life on the sidelines, just getting through the day. There isn’t a simple answer to living your dream life and their obviously isn’t a one size fits all because we all have different passions, dreams, and goals.

So what are some of the keys to having a life you love?


Follow Your Passions

Knowing your passion and living your life in alignment with that is what makes you feel alive. Even better if you have more than one. It doesn’t have to be a huge purposeful mission in life, it can be a hobby that you love, a goal you are working towards, or a moment of mindfulness where you feel present and alive in your life.

Having a passion is what makes you leap out of bed in the morning, motivates you to keep going no matter what, it is all the things in your life that you just can’t get enough of. Sometimes our passions will grow more profound as we get older and hopefully wiser. It may be something that is fleeting but becomes a stepping stone to a new passion you decide to embrace. Passions give you purpose and breathe life into you. When you follow them, you are living your life to the fullest and moving towards your dream life.


Live as Your Authentic Self

What does this even mean? Like many things in life this is a process. We are all given so many beliefs from the people that raise us it becomes challenging to determine is this really my belief about the world, or does it belong to someone else? Being your true self isn’t something you achieve one day and stop, it’s a continual journey.

To really start living as your authentic self, you need to listen to that voice within. Check in with, “How does this feel?” The more you do that, the more in touch you become with you and your true feelings, your beliefs, your vision for your self, not the one someone gave to you. You start to let go of the shoulds and decide on what feels good for you. You get to stop buying into what other people expect you to be or do. You don’t even have to be the person you think you’re supposed to be. All you need to be is your true self.


Keep Moving Forward Despite Your Doubts

Not so easy, right. I know this isn’t simple. Anxiety and fear can easily get the best of you when you start to have doubts. Your doubts and your fears  can keep you locked in place indefinitely and leave you just wishing you had the strength to follow your dreams and become your true self.

When you start to get clear on what you are passionate about and who you really are it becomes a little easier to push through the doubts and fears. You realize that there might be a downside but know that you have the strength to deal with it and that the payoff will be worth it in the end.

Nancy Anderson said, “Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but the ability to take action in the face of fear.”

Sometimes asking, “What’s the worst that could happen?” will help you realize that even if failure is a possible option, not doing it and feeling regret would be a worse outcome.


You Live Your Life For You 

I’m not saying you need to be selfish and heartless. You can still be compassionate and caring of others while checking in with what you need and what would be the best thing for you. It isn’t about saying No to others, it is about saying Yes to you.

The truth is that you are the author of your life, you are the creator of your dream life. It isn’t just going to happen. It will take some planning on your part and that may require you to say no to others once in awhile. Learning to listen to your inner-voice is a skill, and one required to live the life of your dreams. If you are truly living your life to the fullest, then you will be living a life that is true to who you want to be.

So, if you are a bit of a people pleaser you will have some work to do. Forget everyone else’s opinion and live your life so that at the end of each day you can sit back and think, “Yes, I’m proud of what I have achieved today, the lessons I have learned, and who I am.”

We all have different wants and wishes, but as long as you are chasing your true wants and wishes then you can confidently say you are truly living your life.

Living your dream life means you get everything out of life that you possibly can, whatever that might mean to you.

How do you determine what your dream life looks like if you have no idea?

Well this is where the self reflection part is so important. Starting to listen to that inner voice.

Self Reflection is Key

Where are you now in regard to living a life you love? If you are struggling and not even sure you believe that a dream life is possible, that’s okay, you are not alone. I am going to walk you through how to get started.

I’m not saying that you will be high on life every minute of every day. Pretending everything is always okay is like putting a smiley face over the empty gas gauge on your dashboard and hoping you won’t run out of gas. Sometimes bad things will happen – you lose someone you love, you have a really bad day at work, you have financial challenges. It happens but even in difficult times it is possible to be grateful and feel blessed. Life sometimes throws you curve balls but you don’t have to be miserable about it.


Questions to Ponder

If you’re trying to determine what it is that you really want from your life and what will help you love your life, ask yourself the following questions and rely on your intuition to understand whatever comes up for you. However, don’t expect the light bulb to go off the first time you ask these questions. I encourage you to go through these questions daily for 30 days and once you get through all the surface stuff that you think you should want, the good stuff will start to bubble up and then things really start to happen.

What would make your heart sing? 

Right now, at this very moment – what do you want? Empty your feelings onto a sheet of paper, don’t judge or limit yourself. Just write down every thought that comes up and review it later. It might not make a whole lot of sense initially, it’s essentially free flowing, write it all down. This is not the time to analyze or let the rational brain figure it out, this is intuition, feeling, and creativity. This is your dreamer talking.

What is your intuition telling you is the next right thing?

Follow your intuition and sense where you are being led, no matter where it may be guiding you. Emotions aren’t always wise, but your intuition is, so listen to your gut. This will help you filter out some of what you have written as you’ve let yourself flow onto the paper. Learning to listen to and trust your intuition is part of the process required to make sense of what you’ve put down on paper.

What if it’s different than I imagined?

It likely will be, what if it is even better than you imagined. If you are truly following your purpose it won’t matter whether it unfolds as you imagined. It’s important to remember, though, that even when chasing your dreams there will be bumps along the way. Life can never be perfect, but there is something about life’s imperfections that make it worth living. Having the contrast of what we don’t want will keep is dreaming and hopefully in gratitude when things are even better than expected.


How am I sabotaging what I truly want?

 What assumptions could be limiting you from creating a live you love?

  • I’m too tired
  • My life won’t be better than this
  • There’s nothing special about me
  • It’s too late for me
  • I will never make that kind of money
  • Or I need to have X amount to be really happy
  • I’m not smart enough
  • Other people will not be happy if I do this
  • I am not good enough. skilled enough, strong enough, ___________(Fill in the blank)
  • I’m too old
  • I’m too young
  • I don’t have enough money to do what I really want

Start challenging those thoughts, they are just thoughts not facts. You could find an exception to each and everyone of the statements above.

This is not an overnight process. Once you have determined your passions, the elements of your ideal life, you need to take action. Start making decisions that will move you towards your goals. As long as you are moving in the directions of your dreams you are no longer on the sidelines. You are the creator!

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